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12% of websites are pornographic

25% of search engine requests

35% of downloads

43% of internet users view porn

53% of Promise Keeper men viewed porn in the past week

70% of men ages 18-34 view pornography in a typical month

12-17 year olds are the largest consumers of porn


Pornography is a not-so-silent epidemic that is destroying people’s lives, marriages, families, and careers.  Men stuck in this snare have been hooked by one the greatest traps of our day.  Pornography affects the male brain much differently than the female brain, which explains why men can be so easily seduced by images on a screen.  This isn’t an excuse, but it does explain why men struggle with something that has the same impact on the brain as heroin or cocaine.  Once you look and linger, the part of the brain that evaluates cause and effect, future consequences, or learning from past experience shuts down.  It is such a powerful and stimulating experience that all of life’s stresses and troubles fade away for awhile.  This is the nature of any addictive behavior, even if it hasn’t become a full-blown addiction.  (Ask how many women get this effect from shopping; only porn is exponentially more intense). 


I really enjoy working with men and marriages that have suffered the effects of pornography.  Specifically, I love watching the Lord set people free from the bondage of looking at pornography.  Freedom is not white-knuckling it the rest of your life.  Freedom is having a fulfilling life where using porn doesn’t make sense anymore.


When a wife discovers her husband has been looking at pornography, it is like a bomb going off in the marriage.  She typically feels betrayed, angry, terrified, disgusted, and like she can never live up to what her husband has stored in his mind.  Healing these wounds and restoring trust and intimacy to a marriage after the bomb has gone off is one of the most rewarding things I get to do as a counselor.  I have had advanced training in Emotionally Focused Therapy.  This approach is highly effective in helping couples recover from situations that are devastating to the marriage bond (called attachment injuries), like pornography and sexual addiction.  Best of all, when couples go through the healing process, they often have a better relationship than ever before.


If you are struggling with using pornography (or other compulsive sexual behaviors), or if your marriage is reeling from the impact of pornography- give me a call.  I welcome the opportunity help you get your life back on track.



Marriage Counseling